Human-nitarian.

This case dates back to 2009. I had just started working for the City. A gentleman entered the room with a ticket alleging a code violation...

Respondent: Good afternoon, ma'am.

Prosecutor: Hi, do you have a ticket?

Respondent: Yes, ma'am. And I have my statement.

Prosecutor: ::Pause, with inquisitive look:: Okay, hand me what you have and have a seat. We'll call you in a minute.

::Respondent leaves, shuts door. Prosecutor searches for ticket, finds a match. Prosecutor then reads Respondent's statement. Mind you, the statement is in blue and purple glitter pen, and on taped together index cards in the form of a book. The statement is also from a 40 year old man. The following is part of said statement::

"I do not believe I am in violation of the municipal code. There was a violation of my rights as a human being. Part of justice is keep the City right. There was a violation of human rights here. The officers were rude. I was just (enter municipal code violation here) on City property. I was not killin' nobody. The officers harassed me and told me I was not a good person. My defense is that my rights were violated. The police officers were not human-nitarians. They violated my rights. The police officers were not human-nitarians."

Perhaps if the police officers had been a little more kind and stopped acting like aliens, and if these violations weren't strict liability violations, the Respondent wouldn't have had his rights as a human so horribly violated.